I know you, my fears,
We have been acquaintances,
Partners, for so long,
Grown up together.
The longing for other than is –
Give me my ideal self or strike me from this planet,
So strike me.
A point of nowhere,
A place never achieved, nor achievable,
A place other than what is, what I am,
So I tell myself, I am not.
Of not knowing love –
What is this thing that others feel,
And I cannot.
Don’t they know we must live by rock and stone,
And smash the two together,
To make this world?
And tired exhaustion –
Oh why will this dreary show not finish?
Give me black extinction,
Give me the end.